Chapter 20

Holden stayed at the bar and kept getting drunk, he stayed there and got so drunk that he could hardly see. Then he decided that he would give Jane and call, but he changed he mind and instead called Sally Hayes. Her grandmother answered and told him she was asleep but finally she put her on and sally told him to go home and go to bed and hung up eventually. Holden kept pretending that he had been shot in the gut and was holding his stomach for a long time.Holden left the bar and decided to walk to the park and try and see the ducks by the lake. He had no where to go. he started crying and said it was because he was lonesome and depressed. Then he dropped the record for Phoebe. He finally found the pond but he couldnt see any ducks. he was starting to get really cold and had ice chunks in his hair. He thought about what would happen if he died and how all his family would come and they would burry him in a cemetary. Then he started talking about Allie and how they did all this when he died and how he didnt like cemetaries and didnt want to be burried in one. Then he decided he better go see Phoebe in case he died, because Phebe really liked him and would be really sad if he died,so he started walking to his house.

I feel really bad for Holden, his life is really messed up and so is he. He keeps talking about dying and now he is even picturing himself dead. When he talks about his brothers death you can tell it was really hard on him and his family and that none of them have really gotten over him since his death.